MOTIV Test Results

MOTIV Personality Test Results href="http://similarminds.com/motiv/materialist.html">Materialistic

Offbeat
||||||||||||||||||||
81%
Thinking
||||||||||||||||
70%
Intimate
||||||
21%
Vitality
||||||||||||||
60%
Take Free MOTIV Personality Test
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com

Personality Disorder Test Results Paranoid |||| 14% Schizoid |||||||||||||||| 62% Schizotypal |||||||||||| 46% Antisocial |||||||||||| 46% Borderline |||||||||||||||| 66% Histrionic |||||||||||||| 54% Narcissistic |||||||||||||| 58% Avoidant |||||||||||| 42% Dependent |||| 14% Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||||| 54%

Take Free Personality Disorder Test
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com

I Don't Know If You're Alive or Dead

I don't know if you're alive or dead
Can you on earth be sought,
Or only when the sunsets fade
Be mourned serenely in my thought?



A. Akhmatova.  "I Don't Know If You're Alive or Dead".  1915

Question of the Day 3

Question taken from askphilosophers.org:

Although societal pressures do play a role, does atheism manifest itself mostly due to an inborn lack of religious "sense" rather than hearing the logical arguments against God or a life force?

I don't believe any religion (and atheism) comes from a logical standpoint.  Your beliefs, especially those without proof, come from the matters of the heart.  But to answer the question, I think that the reason many people choose atheism is for the power and control, especially the power and control over your own life.  Many religions, including Christianity, is to submit yourself under a higher authority.  Yet with atheism, there is no concept of a higher authority, therefore deeming yourself as the highest authority.  It's the unwillingness to submit, to let go of the control you have over your life.

Then comes the argument that religious people like to be ignorant, or that they prefer to be led around like sheep.  To be frank, I not either.  It's difficult as a Christian to give up my control over my life.  I like being in charge of everything, I like controlling the events around me.  I'm not a Christian because I don't like being in control, but I give up control because I know God is real.

One thing I dislike about the culture that we live in, is that everything needs to be justified with 'scientific proof' that allures to the five senses.  That's why things such as optical illusions are so popular because it questions your ability to trust the five senses.  Today's culture, so wrapped up in the 'trust only what you see' idea, ignores the matters of the heart.  There are things that you just know because you feel it inside your heart, not because you've seen evidence.  That is what faith is.  And faith is the foundation of any belief.

Question of the Day 2

Question taken from askphilosophers.com (not from today but from Aug 22):

Many people see their religion as a guideline for moral/ethical behavior.  Can we be ethical/moral without religion?  If a person does not see that an ethical life leads to "heaven," what is his/her rationale for goodness?

This is a very deep question, and I could go on and on about this, but I'll try my best to make it simple and short.

That true question is what do we perceive as moral or as ethical?  We know that ethics and morals are different depending on the culture.  If you live in a cannibalistic society, eating people wouldn't be unethical to you because you spent your whole life believing it was perfectly normal to eat other human beings.  In fact, you would perceive the people that refused to eat human as 'weird.'  In fact, if you grew up having a ritual of consuming a person every week, and grew up believing that what you did was for the good of society, then you would in fact label someone who refused to be part of the ritual as immoral.  Many people would refute my claim and say that they would never have gone down that path even if born into that society.  But take your current set of values, and really think about where they come from.  They're there because it was instilled in you by your government, by your peers, and by your parents.  Our morals and ethics come from whatever the ruling power (or what we deem the ruling power to be) tells us our ethics and morals are.

Religion is different in that the morals and ethics do not come directly from the society around us, but that it comes through what we believe to be the highest authority.  Christians use the Bible as a moral guideline because we believe that God uses to Bible to tell us what our morals and ethics should be.  Granted, the morality over the years, even if guided by the same Bible, has shifted over generations because of the taint of the society around us.

A person will follow this set of rules to remain moral and ethical so as to not be outcast from the society he or she lives in.  There was a time where if two people got into an argument, whoever could win a duel would win the argument.  Nowadays we consider that completely outrageous.  But if you refused to cooperate during that period of time, then you would be outcast from society.  You would therefore follow along so you could stay close to your friends and family.  It is exactly the same concept today.  The difference in Christianity is that we don't care to be moral or ethical to remain within a society.  In fact, we don't need to remain completely moral and ethical to get to heaven, because we believe that heaven is not a place you go because you are good, but a place you go because Jesus died for you.  We try to remain moral and ethical as to be pleasing in the eyes of God who is looking down upon us because we love Him.

What is the Cross?

The cross can be seen on top of every church building, inside every sanctuary, hung on the walls at home, and worn around necks.  But what does it represent?

Yes, we know that the cross represents the fact that Jesus died on the cross, but what does the cross represent about the people wearing it/using it?

For some people, it's a symbol of their pride.  They wear it and show it off, thinking that it gives them a higher status in their social ladder.  Others use it as a symbol of hate.  They use the cross as an excuse to degrade others and humiliate those they disagree with.  Still others would use the cross as a social connector.  Do you wear the cross?  Me too!  Let's be friends.

But what does the cross really stand for?

The cross isn't some piece of jewelry or a cute symbol to be added on to a shirt.  The cross represents humility and shame.  At the time Jesus was crucified, the cross was taken up by those that were the worst of the worst.  The lowest of the criminals.  It was the most brutal way to die.  Those that were on the cross were mocked by everyone.  And the so-called king of the heavens ended up dying the worst of a sinner's death.  But we hang that cross to remind ourselves that it happened.  That Jesus went through all that for us.  In the ritual of it all, sometimes we forget, and our children grow up not knowing the true meaning behind the cross.  Jesus didn't just die.  He didn't just get the death penalty.  He went out of this life the worst way any human could leave.

But He came back.  And that's the true miracle of it all.

Another Weird Dream

This was a weird dream I had this last weekend.

Background:

I go to a school in Berkeley.  It was only about a month ago I found out that the guy I like(d?) used to live right up the hill from my school until at least earlier this year.  The last time I went to visit, I took the back roads to get there instead of the highway.  I don't know if he's moved, if he's still living there, or if he's even alive, really.  The guy I liked before him got married a couple years ago and now has a baby with his wife.

The dream:

I was on my way to school, but instead of taking the highway, I took the back roads because there was less traffic.  I parked my car at a campus parking lot in South Berkeley, and walked through the Clark Kerr campus to get to my school.  (This is an extremely roundabout way to get to my school, and I knew that even in my dream.)  As I crossed the street onto a park (there is no park across the street in real life), I saw him.  He was pushing a stroller.  I looked at him, and he looked at me, and we recognized each other, but I was late to class so I rushed by.  I don't know how I found out, but he had gotten married and had a baby within a span of a year.

* Side Note:  I need better dreams to talk about.

Discipleship

Discipleship has been a main point of interest in the youth group I'm working with. Without discipleship, my pastor has seen strong youth believers go astray in college. But with discipleship the church grew strong. Leaders were created, training the younger ones to be the next generation of leaders, and the leadership spread to the schools. The people were more dedicated, and stayed true to their faith even in college.  My pastor learned the importance of training the youth to be disciples of Christ, and to make more disciples of Christ. 

I used to be a part of a different life group. It was an amazing group. The people were warm and welcoming. They were very friendly and giving. But something was always missing, and I didn't know what it was. But now I think it was the lack of discipleship in the church and the lack of the Holy Spirit leading and guiding the group. Within the life group they share their stories and encourage each other to follow their dreams. But there wasn't enough of following Jesus. The life group was very focused on themselves. (It can be a good thing in moderation.)  But the group lacked focus on Jesus and being His disciples. There would be talks including Jesus's name but the focus was not on Him. It was always about 'my job,' 'my career,' 'my dreams,' 'my goals,' and just 'my life' in general. That's great. I'm not saying it's not a good thing to talk about in a life group. But they would talk about Jesus simply as a provider. 'Jesus will give me this.'  'Jesus will let me do that.' Where is the worshiping?  Where is the praise?  Where is the study of the Word? Jesus is more than a provider. He's our Savior and King. That lack of focus and the lack of commitment makes the life group feel more like a support group instead of a Christian group.

When it comes to anything, any relationship, the focus needs to be on God. The lack of focus will cause people to stray. Our life isn't about us. It's about God. 

Stability

My life in the past two years had almost no real stability.  Feb moved home, broke up, started going to church, April got job, June changed jobs, Aug started school, Oct moved out, Dec quit school, March changed church, Aug started school, and now it's November again.  Every couple of months something big happens in my life.  This one is no different.  My pastor is leaving.

This is the pastor that really changed my life for the better when I was in high school.  This is the pastor that stuck around for almost nine years for a youth group.  I was really hoping that while I was in Richmond, I'd be able to learn a lot from him.  I was expecting myself to leave before he did.  But only after half a year, he's leaving.  It makes me pretty sad, and pretty anxious.  What would the youth group look like without a steady pastor?  What will I look like as a Bible study teacher without him?  I was talking to my sister last night and she said something quite wise.  The best way to learn to do something is to do it yourself.  I just don't feel ready for him to leave.  But the way the youth group is organized right now, I guess God thinks we're ready.  I've known for a while that I felt like I was brought back to Richmond so I could come back to my roots to start over and start growing again.  My friend said it sounded like God was pulling out my roots.

But even though so many things will continue to change in my life, there's one thing that I can always count on to be there and stay the same.  God is my stability.  My reliance is on Him.